


like a lifeline (for the horror-struck)

by OfUpsideDownHerons



Series: Rescuing Characters From Terrible Narratives [1]
Category: By the Light of the Moon - Dean Koontz
Genre: Autism, Canon Autistic Character, Canon Disabled Character, Fear, Gen, Jigsaw Puzzles, Repetition, Rescuing Characters From Terrible Narratives, Stimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-10 23:52:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/791610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OfUpsideDownHerons/pseuds/OfUpsideDownHerons
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It wasn't that Shep was unaware. Shep was <b>more</b> than aware. Shep was <i>terrified</i>. Shepherd O'Conner pov of going-ons on chapter three.</p>
            </blockquote>





	like a lifeline (for the horror-struck)

**Author's Note:**

> Because honestly, Koontz did a terrible job at writing an autistic character. The book was full of allistic fail. Shep deserves better.

It wasn’t that Shep was unaware of what was going on. It was only that sometimes ( _often_ times) Shep got stuck; got locked into doing things. Things tended to narrow down to a pinpoint focus, no matter what else was going on. Even if other things going on were _important_.

(puzzle piece, fit, put into place. puzzle piece, no fit found, discard for now, come back later. teeter-totter, went the hand not used for puzzling. teeter-totter. teeter-totter. teeter-totter. flapflapflap, like waving, like waving bye, like waving _bye, rock-a-bye baby_ , bye-bye-bye. teeter-totter.)

Shep was aware. **More** than aware.  
(voice familiar, like a gunshot, like the moonlight. like the other puzzle with the puppies still missing parts of their faces, and sweat, and _“you do your work by the light of the moon”_ , and-)  
Shep was scared.  
(both hands on puzzle pieces now, puzzle like a lifeline, hands moving fast, both hands because Shep almost thought Shep was drowning.)  
No. Shep was not scared. Shep was _terrified_. Terrified, panic-stricken, horror-struck and so many other words that meant the same thing, and Shep needed to complete this puzzle.

(a noise, a repetition, a “Shepherd! Shepherd! Shepherd!” and drowning; faster, faster, Shep _needed_ this puzzle done. scared! terrified!)

“Doodle-deedle-doodle.”  
(was what came out of Shep’s mouth, because it was what he had at the moment, a repetition for a repetition, a prayer for a prayer, a reply for an urgency, because Shep was _stuck_ , and Shep was scared, Dylan was scared, a fear for a fear.)  
“Doodle-deedle-doodle.”  
“Doodle-deedle-doodle.”


End file.
